If I Fall Will You Catch Me
by i luv everything
Summary: Remus is hurt and falls into depression and harms himself. Can Sirius catch him or will Remus fall. Warnings: Rape, Self harm, Suicide thoughts, MPreg
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1-  
Help!**

I sat in my Defense Against The Dark Arts class taking notes on the lesson about nonverbal spells. I was watching and listening as Proffessor Winters (AN: Made up the name Roman Winters for the teacher) while Peter was sleeping and James and Sirius were passing notes. I looked over at Sirius who was next to passing notes to James who was infront of us next to Peter.

A note landed on the parchment I was currently writing on. I sighed and opened it immediately noticing Sirius's messy writing.

Moony,  
Meet in the Room Of Requirements after class  
-Padfoot

I looked at Sirius who had a devilish smirk on his face. I sighed yet again and nodded. This was the last class of the day and I guess we were planing some prank to do to someone at dinner. I looked at Proffessor Winters as he continued to talk and avoided looking at the other side of the room where the Slytherins were.

I continued to write notes as Proffessor Winters talked about nonverbal spells. I looked over and saw Sirius stretching his arms above his head. His shirt stretching out across his chest and stomach, rising a few inches displaying a little of his perfect unscarred skin that showed a V fron his low rising loose pants that held a much greater item that I would just love to wrap my mouth around...

I quickly snapped out of my thoughts. I couldn't think like that. Not about Sirius, even though I would love to kiss those pink lips. Damn, stop it. I can't think about Sirius like that. He's one of my best mates, for Merlin's sake. Just then the bell rang, thank Merlin. I stood up and grabbed my bag, which split at that exact moment.

"I got it, you guys go on ahead," I told the others as they nodded and left. I was the last in class by then still picking up my stuff. Proffessor Winters walked over to me and nelt down.

"Let me help," he said and grabbed some of my books that fell. He lent in unccomfortbly close to me and picked up a few quills. His arm brushed against my pelvic region and I am pretty sure my face was completely red.

"Thanks," I mumbled as I picked up the rest of my stuff. I quickly shoved all my stuff in my newly repaired bag and stood up. I only took two steps before I felt ropes circle around my wrists and ankles causing me to crash to the ground.

"Your not going anywhere," Proffessor Winters whispered in my ear.

"What are you doing," I said my voice choking with fear.

"Just having some fun," he purred lifting me by my bound wrists. He waved his wand. "Selencio. Now no ones going to hear us now." I whimpered as he roughly dragged me by my bound wrists and bent me over his desk.

"STOP," I screamed as he came up behind.

"Now why would I want to do that," Winters started unbuttoning my pants and pulling them down. "When i've got you in this lovely position." He kissed the back of my neck as I continued to struggle. My pants and briefs pooled around my ankles.

"PLEASE, MERLIN STOP," I cried feeling his hands on my arse.

"I don't think so," Winters slapped my arse hard and I whimpered. "This is gonna be fun." And with that he slammed into me pushing me painfully into his desk. I screamed at the pain I was feeling. I couldn't believe this. This couldn't be happening. I, Remus Lupin, was being raped. I continued to scream as he painfully withdrew from my arse only to slam back even more painfully.

Winters leaned over me so his chest was against my back. I felt something warm trickling down my thighs and realized with horror that it was blood. I had tears freely running down my face now. I screamed until my voice was hoarse and cried as pain and humiliation washed over me. How could this have happened?

"That's right little bitch," Winters whispered in my ear though I could barely hear him over my screams. "Your such a good little slut. With that cock hungry ass of yours." He pulled out and pushed back in hard enough to leave bruises from slamming into the desk. "I've been watching you for awhile now." WHAT! "Yeah, I always liked the good little boys. So innocent and pure. And I always enjoyed taking that away from them."

"Please stop," I choked out through the pain.

"Did I say you could speak," Winters growled and brought his fist down roughly onto the side of my head so hard I could see stars and feel blood blind my right eye. By now all I was feeling was a blinding white pain. "Such a lovely little body of yours."

I was in so much pain I nearly passed out a couple of times, but each time Winters yanked me by my hair and say: "Your gonna stay awake for this, yah little slut." Why? Why? Why? I kept asking this to myself as the pain intensified. Why was this happening to me? Why was a proffessor of all people doing this to me? Why wasn't anyone coming to help me? Surely my mates will figure out something happened and come help me, right?

I felt him pull out of me and thought that he was done. Until he grabbed me by my still bound wrists and brought down infront of him on my knees, right infront of his cock. I gulped and noticed the streaks of blood on it mixed with pre cum.

"Suck," Winter ordered grabbing my hair. I yelped in pain as he twisted my hair. "Bite it and I won't hesitate to use the killing curse." Winter threatened me. "And if you suck it good I won't hurt your precious little Sirius Black." I widened my eyes and felt my mouth go dry. I looked fearfully up at him and he chuckled. "That's right, I seen the way you look at him. How much you wish for him to love you back. But the truth is it will never happen."

I looked up at him and glared at him as hard as I could with the pain from my still bleeding arse. I wish I could just drop dead right here and right now instead of face anymore of this pain.

"The truth is," Winter continued. "Your a worthless little slut. No one cares about you, those friends of yours just pity you."

"Y-your w-wrong," I stuttered and felt dizzy from the blood loss from my head and arse.

"I didn't say you could talk," Winters growled and slapped me hard enough to leave a bruise and it hurt worst because he still had my hair in his hands. "Now be a good little slut and suck." He pulled my hair and forced my mouth onto his cock. I could taste his horrid pre cum and my own blood as he made me bob my head back and forth.

I didn't want Sirius or the others hurt so I sucked and licked his cock hating my self for it. I sucked his tip as I heard him moan. He pulled me off his cock roughly and forced me to my hands and knees and got behind me. Not again.

"I want to cum inside of you," Winter grinned evily. He roughly soved back into me as I screamed and after three thrusts I felt his burning hot seed fill me up and screamed louder. I calapsed to the ground when he pulled out. I felt a pain and heard a few cracks as he kicked me in the ribs. As I lay there bleading he repeatedly kicked and hit me. "If you tell anyone then you can say goodbye to your precious Sirius Black."

I felt him pick me up unlock the door and carry me through the empty corridors, everyone most likely being at dinner by now. I felt him through me into a side corridor and from the pain in my arm I could tell it was broken. I watched through half lidded eyes as he disapparated upon hearing three sets of footsteps.

I watched as a group as three boys stopped at the end of the corridor and looked at me and they came running towards me. The last thing I saw before darkness was the worried face of Sirius Black, the one I loved.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2- Hospital Wing I awoke to hushed voices talking above me. I could make out two on my left side arguing. I slowly opened my eyes and had to squint from the blinding white light. What happened? I then remembered what Proffessor Winters did to me and clenched my fists in the bed sheets. "He's awake," someone said. Peter? My eyes adjusted to the light and I could see clearly that two voices from before were James and Lily fighting in whispers on my left and a fearful Peter and oddly quiet Sirius were on my right. Upon hearing Peter James and Lily stopped arguing and looked at me. I looked at them. Lily had tears running tears down her face, James looked ready to curse someone, Peter looked terrified, and Sirius had an oddly blank look to his face. "Remus," Lily cried out. "H-hey g-guys," I noticed my voice was hoarse. I looked up and smiled up at them as best I could through the pain. "Here, drink this," Lily said lifting a glass of water to my lips. I drank it greedily as she helped me drink. I looked at them and saw worried looks on their faces. "What happened? Where am I?" I asked trying to sit up only to be pushed back down by James. "Your in the Hospital Wing," Lily spoke softly. "We found you in a side corridor," Peter spoke up sadly. "You were bloody and bruised," James continued for them. "Remus we know what happened to you. Do you know who did it?" I nodded. "Tell us then." I shook my head. I couldn't tell them not after the threat Winters made. 'If you tell anyone then you can say goodbye to your precious Sirius Black.' "Remus, please," begged Lily as she tried to look me in the eyes, but I kept my head down. I just shook my head again feeling tears well up in my eyes. I couldn't tell them. I could hear Lily, James, and Peter begging me to tell them who did this but I kept shaking my head tears silently streaming down my face. I noticed Sirius hadn't talked since I woke up. I didn't want to talk about it, why didn't they see that. I didn't want to relive that horrible memory. I felt arms encircle me and pull me towards a hard chest. I looked up and saw Sirius looking sadly down at me. I burried my head in his chest and sobbed. Sirius looked up and said: "Guys, it's obvious he doesn't want to talk about it right now," Sirius's voice choked as if he had been crying. But that couldn't be, Sirius never cried. "Alright," sighed Lily whose eyes were a puffy red. "But Remus you have to tell us sooner or later. The man who did this has to be punished." I didn't say anything but clang to Sirius's shirt as if my life depended on it. "Moony," James said. "Madam Pomfrey said your going to be here for a few days, maybe a week, so we're gonna go get you some things. Some books and we'll collect your homework from the lessons you'll miss. We'll even knick you choclate from the kitchens." I nodded, still not looking at them from where my face was burried in Sirius's shirt still. "Come on Sirius," Peter said. "I'll stay here with Moony ," he said patting my back. "You guys go on a head." I heard them shuffle out of the Hospital Wing. "Moony," he said softly. "Y-yeah," my voice choked with a sob as I pulled away and looked at Sirius. "I'm glad your okay," he started. "When I saw you like that, so...so broken and bruised I was terrified. Terrified that you'd be dead by the time we got you help from how much blood you were losing." "You were," I asked looking at my hands in my lap. "Of course I was," Sirius kept his arms on my shoulders. "Your one of my best mates." There it was. All we were was friends, nothing more, nothing less. No matter how much it hurt. "Sirius," I said refusing to look up now. "Thanks for being my friend." "Of course Moony," Sirius sounded as though he was about to cry. I heard the door open and Lily, James, and Peter walked in. "Here Moony," Peter said quietly handing me a bar of choclate. I smiled at him and took a bite of the sweetness. "Thanks," I said still not looking at anyone. How could I? I'm surprised their even treating me this way. Especially with how impure and disgusting I am. I didn't deserve friends like these. "Hello Remus," Madam Pomfrey came up to me carrying a tray of food. Sitting it down on my lap she smiled sadly at me and left. I looked down at the food and slowly started eating. I didn't want to eat, I didn't deserve to eat. I only ate so my friends would worry a little less. As I took another bite I felt the burning bile rise in my throat but forced it back down. I finished my food and felt my eyes droop. Lily took the now empty tray off my lap and push me to lay down on the bed. "You need rest." Someone said but I couldn't tell who because I let sleep consume me. 


End file.
